Hagshama

This section of the resource book explores different ways that people, in HDNA and otherwise, have and can be active in striving for peace.  It includes various articles that describe the experiences of those who have acted upon ideals of peace and coexistence.

Personal Testimony of an Israeli Refusenik

International Solidarity Movement April campaign Over view of what I had seen in the last two weeks

Working For a Just Peace

What Habonim Did to Me!

 

Personal Testimony of an Israeli Refusenik

[Asaf Oron, a Sergeant Major in the Giv'ati Brigade, is one of the original 53 Israeli soldiers who signed the "Fighters' Letter" declaring that from now on they will refuse to serve in the Occupied territories. He is signer #8 and one of the first in the list to include a statement explaining his action. (There are 251 signers as of February 17, 2002.) Below is the translation of Oron's statement by Ami Kronfeld of Jewish Peace News.]

On February 5, 1985, I got up, left my home, went to the Compulsory Service Center on Rashi Street in Jerusalem, said goodbye to my parents, boarded the rickety old bus going to the Military Absorption Station and turned into a soldier.

Exactly seventeen years later, I find myself in a head to head confrontation with the army, while the public at large is jeering and mocking me from the sidelines. Right wingers see me as a traitor who is dodging the holy war that's just around the corner. The political center shakes a finger at me self-righteously and lectures me about undermining democracy and politicizing the army.

And the left? The square, establishment, "moderate" left that only yesterday was courting my vote now turns its back on me as well. Everyone blabbers about what is and what is not legitimate, exposing in the process the depth of their ignorance of political theory and their inability to distinguish a real democracy from a third world regime in the style of Juan Peron.

Almost no one asks the main question: why would a regular guy get up one morning in the middle of life, work, the kids and decide he's not playing the game anymore? And how come he is not alone but there are fifty... I beg your pardon, a hundred... beg your pardon again, now almost two hundred regular, run of the mill guys like him who've done the same thing?

Our parents' generation lets out a sigh: we've embarrassed them yet again. But isn't it all your fault? What did you raise us on? Universal ethics and universal justice, on the one hand: peace, liberty and equality to all. And on the other hand: "the Arabs want to throw us into the sea," "They are all crafty and primitive. You can't trust them."

On the one hand, the songs of John Lennon, Pete Seeger, Bob Dylan, Bob Marely, Pink Floyd. Songs of peace and love and against militarism and war. On the other hand, songs about a sweetheart riding the tank after sunset in the field: "The tank is yours and you are ours." [allusions to popular Israeli songs - AK]. I was raised on two value systems: one was the ethical code and the other the tribal code, and I naïvely believed that the two could coexist.

This is the way I was when I was drafted. Not enthusiastic, but as if embarking on a sacred mission of courage and sacrifice for the benefit of society. But when, instead of a sacred mission, a 19 year old finds himself performing the sacrilege of violating human beings' dignity and freedom, he doesn't dare ask - even himself - if it's OK or not. He simply acts like everyone else and tries to blend in. As it is, he's got enough problems, and boy is the weekend far off.

You get used to it in a hurry, and many even learn to like it. Where else can you go out on patrol - that is, walk the streets like a king, harass and humiliate pedestrians to your heart's content, and get into mischief with your buddies - and at the same time feel like a big hero defending your country? The Gaza Exploits became heroic tales, a source of pride for Giv' ati, then a relatively new brigade suffering from low self esteem.

For a long time, I could not relate to the whole "heroism" thing. But when, as a sergeant, I found myself in charge, something cracked inside me. Without thinking, I turned into the perfect occupation enforcer. I settled accounts with "upstarts" who didn't show enough respect. I tore up the personal documents of men my father's age. I hit, harassed, served as a bad example - all in the city of Kalkilia, barely three miles from grandma and grandpa's home-sweet-home. No. I was no "aberration." I was exactly the norm. 

Having completed my compulsory service, I was discharged, and then the first Intifada began (how many more await us?) Ofer, a comrade in arms who remained in the service has become a hero: the hero of the second Giv'ati trial. He commanded a company that dragged a detained Palestinian demonstrator into a dark orange grove and beat him to death.

As the verdict stated, Ofer was found to have been the leader in charge of the whole business. He spent two months in jail and was demoted - I think that was the most severe sentence given an Israeli soldier through the entire first Intifada, in which about a thousand Palestinians were killed. Ofer's battalion commander testified that there was a order from the higher echelons to use beatings as a legitimate method of punishment, thereby implicating himself.

On the other hand, Efi Itam, the brigade commander, who had been seen beating Arabs on numerous occasions, denied that he ever gave such an order and consequently was never indicted. Today he lectures us on moral conduct on his way to a new life in politics. (In the current Intifada, incidentally, the vast majority of incidents involving Palestinian deaths are not even investigated. No one even bothers.)

And in the meantime, I was becoming more of a civilian. A copy of The Yellow Wind [a book on life in the Occupied Territories by the Israeli writer David Grossman, available in English -AK] which had just come out, crossed my path. I read it, and suddenly it hit me. I finally understood what I had done over there. What I had been over there.

I began to see that they had cheated me: They raised me to believe there was someone up there taking care of things. Someone who knows stuff that is beyond me, the little guy. And that even if sometimes politicians let us down, the "military echelon" is always on guard, day and night, keeping us safe, each and every one of their decisions the result of sacred necessity.

Yes, they cheated us, the soldiers of the Intifadas, exactly as they had cheated the generation that was beaten to a pulp in the War of Attrition and in the Yom Kippur War, exactly as they had cheated the generation that sank deep into the Lebanese mud during the Lebanon invasions. And our parents' generation continues to be silent.

Worse still, I understood that I was raised on two contradictory value systems. I think most people discover even at an earlier age they must choose between two value systems: an abstract, demanding one that is no fun at all and that is very difficult to verify, and another which calls to you from every corner - determining who is up and who is down, who is king and who - pariah, who is one of us and who is our enemy. Contrary to basic common sense, I picked the first. Because in this country the cost-effective analysis comparing one system to another is so lopsided, I can't blame those who choose the second.

I picked the first road, and found myself volunteering in a small, smoke-filled office in East Jerusalem, digging up files about deaths, brutality, bureaucratic viciousness or simply daily harassments. I felt I was atoning, to some extent, for my actions during my days with the Giv'ati brigade. But it also felt as if I was trying to empty the ocean out with a teaspoon.

Out of the blue, I was called up for the very first time for reserve duty in the Occupied Territories. Hysterically, I contacted my company commander. He calmed me down: We will be staying at an outpost overlooking the Jordan river. No contacts with the local population is expected. And that indeed was what I did, but some of my friends provided security for the Damia Bridge terminal [where Palestinians cross from Jordan to Israel and vice versa - AK].

This was in the days preceding the Gulf War and a large number of Palestinian refugees were flowing from Kuwait to the Occupied Territories (from the frying pan into the fire). The reserve soldiers - mostly right wingers - cringed when they saw the female conscripts stationed in the terminal happily ripping open down-comforters and babies' coats to make sure they didn't contain explosives. I too cringed when I heard their stories, but I was also hopeful: reserve soldiers are human after all, whatever their political views.

Such hopes were dashed three years later, when I spent three weeks with a celebrated reconnaissance company in the confiscated ruins of a villa at the outskirts of the Abasans (if you don't know where this is, it's your problem). This is where it became clear to me that the same humane reserve soldier could also be an ugly, wretched macho undergoing a total regression back to his days as a young conscript.

Already on the bus ride to the Gaza strip, the soldiers were competing with each other: whose "heroic" tales of murderous beatings during the Intifada were better (in case you missed this point: the beatings were literally murderous: beating to death).

Going on patrol duty with these guys once was all that I could take. I went up to the placement officer and requested to be given guard duty only. Placement officers like people like me: most soldiers can't tolerate staying inside the base longer than a couple of hours.

Thus began the nausea and shame routine, a routine that lasted three tours of reserve duty in the Occupied Territories: 1993, 1995, and 1997. The "pale-gray" refusal routine.

For several weeks at a time I would turn into a hidden "prisoner of conscience," guarding an outpost or a godforsaken transmitter on top of some mountain, a recluse. I was ashamed to tell most of my friends why I chose to serve this way. I didn't have the energy to hear them get on my case for being such a "wishy washy" softy.

I was also ashamed of myself: This was the easy way out. In short, I was ashamed all over. I did "save my own soul." I was not directly engaged in wrongdoing - only made it possible for others to do so while I kept guard.

Why didn't I refuse outright? I don't know. It was partly the pressure to conform, partly the political process that gave us a glimmer of hope that the whole occupation business would be over soon. More than anything, it was my curiosity to see actually what was going on over there.

And precisely because I knew so well, first hand, from years of experience what was going on over there, what reality was like over there, I had no trouble seeing, through the fog of war and the curtain of lies, what has been taking place over there since the very first days of the second Intifada.

For years, the army had been feeding on lines like "We were too nice in the first Intifada," and "If we had only killed a hundred in the very first days, everything would have been different." Now the army was given license to do things its way. I knew full well that [former Prime Minister] Ehud Barak was giving the army free hand, and that [current Chief of Staff] Shaul Mofaz was taking full advantage of this to maximize the bloodshed.

By then, I had two little kids, boys, and I knew from experience that no one - not a single person in the entire world - will ever make sure that my sons won't have to serve in the Occupied Territories when they reach 18. No one, that is, except me. And no one but me will have to look them in the eye when they're all grown up and tell them where dad was when all that happened. It was clear to me: this time I was not going.

Initially, this was a quiet decision, still a little shy, something like "I am just a bit weird, can't go and can't talk about it too much either." But as time went by, as the level of insanity, hatred, and incitement kept rising, as the generals were turning the Israeli Defense Forces into a terror organization, the decision was turning into an outcry: "If you can't see that this is one big crime leading us to the brink of annihilation, then something is terribly wrong with you!"

And then I discovered that I was not alone. Like discovering life on another planet.

The truth is that I understand why everyone is mad at us. We spoiled the neat little order of things. The holy Status Quo states that the Right holds the exclusive rights to celebrate the blood and ask for more. The role of the Left, on the other hand, is to wail while sitting in their armchairs sipping wine and waiting for the Messiah to come and with a single wave of his magic wand make the Right disappear along with the settlers, the Arabs, the weather, and the entire Middle East. That's how the world is supposed to work. So why are you causing such a disturbance? What's your problem? Bad boys!

Woe to you, dear establishment left! You haven't been paying attention! That Messiah has been here already. He waved his magic wand, saw things aren't that simple, was abandoned in the midst of battle, lost altitude, and finally was assassinated, with the rest of us (yes, me too) watching from the comfort of our armchairs. Forget it. A messiah doesn't come around twice! There is no such thing as a free lunch.

Don't you really see what we are doing, why it is that we stepped out of line? Don't you get the difference between a low key, personal refusal and an organized, public one? (and make no mistake about it, the private refusal is the easier choice.) You really don't get it? So let me spell it out for you.

First, we declare our commitment to the first value system. The one that is elusive, abstract, and not profitable. We believe in the moral code generally known as God (and my atheist friends who also signed this letter would have to forgive me - we all believe in God, the true one, not that of the Rabbis and the Ayatollahs). We believe that there is no room for the tribal code, that the tribal code simply camouflages idolatry, an idolatry

of a type we should not cooperate with. Those who let such a form of idol worship take over will end up as burnt offerings themselves.

Second, we (as well as some other groups who are even more despised and harassed) are putting our bodies on the line, in the attempt to prevent the next war. The most unnecessary, most idiotic, cruel and immoral war in the history of Israel.

We are the Chinese young man standing in front of the tank. And you? If you are nowhere to be seen, you are probably inside the tank, advising the driver

International Solidarity Movement April campaign
Over view of what I had seen in the last two weeks:

By Kate

I had planned to join a campaign organized by the International Solidarity Movement (ISM) in April.  My goal was to join a delegation of internationals that were going to Palestine. We would work in solidarity with Palestinian community members in various camps and villages doing acts of non-violent resistance.  Five days before my flight to Israel, Prime Minister Sharon declared war on Palestine after the bombing of a Passover Sadder.

The ISM campaign had shifted. It was decided that there was a greater need for an international presence in targeted areas i.e. Arafat's compound in Ramallah and two refugee camps in Bethlehem, Al Azza Camp and Aida Camp. These camps were already experiencing curfews, blackouts, constant military presence plus missiles, gunfire and US Apache helicopters overhead.

One group of internationals successfully marched into Arafat's compound a few days into the campaign. The internationals in Bethlehem then held a march at the Israeli Embassy and were fired upon. Ricocheting shrapnel nicked several demonstrators; one woman was shot directly in the stomach. She received immediate surgery and is now walking. All of this happened before I arrived. After grappling with my courage, I decided to go ahead with my flight
The scary parts

1. Getting there:
The most frightening part of my journey was the actual trip from NY to Bethlehem. I'm not a world traveler. I was kind of left to my wits to get from Jerusalem to Bethlehem because the main organizers were stuck with Arafat in his compound. After a few attempts, I found a cab driver that was willing to take me on a daring and expensive ride past several blocked roads and military checkpoints. He had Palestinian license plates and was driving around asking Sheppard’s if they had seen tanks or snipers. He dropped me off at one of his friend's houses in a near by town. There, they arranged for me to walk to a clinic where an ambulance that was transporting a woman who had been treated to her home would take me the rest of the way. I was dropped off at Al Azza Refugee Camp to meet the rest of my friends in the April delegation.

2. Ambulance rides:
Ambulance drivers were constantly being harassed, and shot at by Israeli soldiers. The contents of their ambulances, including badly hurt people were detained and held for many hours for no reason. The presence of an international, especially an American, in the ambulance greatly improved the chances of getting much needed care to folks under curfew who were unable to get to the hospital. I had the opportunity to ride through Manger Square (the location of the Church of the Nativity were two hundred folks had barricaded themselves). We picked up a senior citizen with diabetes whose legs needed care.

I will never think of Bethlehem in the same way. We drove at top-speed over broken waterlines jumping out to kick poles and rubble from our path. Manger Square is an ancient, sacred area that was probably really beautiful at one time. Now it's shredded. There were large holes torn through the buildings. The metal storefronts were ripped from the walls, the cars on the street were flattened like pancakes, completely smashed by tanks. The whole place was smoldering with burning rubble and garbage. We got the woman to the hospital where she was treated. We tried to return her to her home but a soldier shot at the ambulance and we had to turn back.

3. Walking parents with their babies to the children's' hospital:
I was honestly eager to get out of the camp and give my emotions a break by taking this risk. I only saw a tank once on this walk. It took every bit of courage I had not duck and hide. We just stood there with our big white skin and our big blue passports surrounding the parents while the soldiers hesitated and then moved on.

4. Food drop to Manger Square:
A UN truck dropped off a shipment in Bethlehem but was unable to deliver it to the families in the Manger Square area who had been under curfew for over eight days. We were asked to help hand deliver it. Thirteen Internationals followed by about ten press (who were all wearing flack jackets and helmets) carried bags of food speaking English at the top of our lungs down the narrow road. There was constant gunfire down there. Two cars were blown up in our path a few minutes before our arrival. We were so far along at that point we decided drop the food off but not to go all the way into manger square. We stopped a little bit beyond the perimeter. People were sticking their heads out of the windows begging us to come and leave the food so we did. Folks came running out to get the food and an Israeli soldier came around the corner shooting. No warning shot. We ran. This action was well publicized. The Israeli government was shamed for not allowing the families in Manger Square access to food. The next day an Italian convoy of trucks was allowed delivered more food.

5. Presence in the camp:
None of our attempts at non-violent direct action could stop the destruction that the US backed Israeli military was imposing on these Palestinians. We could tell that our presence was helping this camp only because camps without people watching, Jenin and Nablus, were being destroyed. I witnessed the grief and anger build as folks sat under curfew and watched their loved ones being killed and threatened throughout the West Bank and Gaza.
Experience in the Azza camp:
I just want to be clear that this is through my American eyes. I wish you could hear the stories directly from the Palestinians that I met. Their voices are blatantly missing. All of the families in the camp have the surname Azza. These families were relocated fifty years ago from their village which the Israeli government leveled and renamed Beit Jammal. Every camp member is bound by the memory of their land and a commitment to return to it. People in the camp were constantly telling me that they were tired. They barraged my naive American brain with stories of their struggle. These folks were so kind and just so gracious. They would serve us meal after meal, coffee after coffee far beyond their means. They welcomed us into their homes to explain what they had been through during fifty years of occupation. I was there over a week. The emotional torment that was imposed upon them by the Israeli military during my stay was over whelming. Israeli soldiers, often eighteen years old and trigger-happy control the lives of the people living in the camp with a never-ending supply of American made weapons. Tanks pass and shoot at the camp five times a day. They generally just shoot around, often at the water barrels on the tops of the buildings. But all of the houses have bullet holes through the walls and windows. The kid's room were I was staying had a hole that went through the window, through the wall and then through the wall in the living room which was covered up by a post card. Over a thousand people live in the camp. The camp is the size of a city block. It's packed with small flats cut by a maze of narrow alleys that are covered in pro-Palestinian graffiti. Everyone is under curfew during the occupation. Every three or four days curfew is lifted for three hours and people are allowed to leaved the camp to get supplies and seek medical care. No one is allowed to work or go to school. Hundreds of little kids play in the alleys. The adults take turns watching them and watching the news.

The news:
I have never seen such comprehensive news coverage in my life. Al Jazeera News was everywhere, breaking news in completely closed areas that other stations, the UN, Red Cross and Collin Powell were too afraid to go. The news castors never seemed to sleep. I saw one of them in Bethlehem and got her to take a picture with me. The television news is always on in the house.

The International Solidarity Movement:
A group of us met with some of the original organizers of the April campaign to express our concerns and to find out what we could bring back to our friends who are eager to help in the states. Here is what I gathered:

*This is a campaign organized by Palestinians and Internationals. The priority of the organizing energy has been spent making contacts and building relationships in Palestine. Much of that work has been set back by the recent Israeli military occupation. People need to recover. The original vision for a massive 50 day June campaign that is lead by Palestinian organizers with the support of many, many international allies will likely happen in a pared down form with appropriate actions that Palestine can handle gauging the current resources. There is still a need to come and bear witness and bring our stories back home. We just have to be careful not to tap the meager resources of the Palestinians with one zillion internationals, eager to help.
*A constant, well-organized, international presence is needed. Internationals should understand that there is a lot of chaos and risk involved. Logistics are currently being worked out. It seems like the organizers could use folks with solid logistical backgrounds who are willing to set up some of the groundwork rather than do the dangerous stuff. · International Allies should start brainstorming at-home actions that speak to their communities. Our job is to build support in hometowns which is what we know how to do best.
*Once there is an Israeli pull out, folks can start working on a call for worldwide solidarity actions.
*It would be cool if we could get access to an English translation to Al Jazeera satellite news…

Working For a Just Peace

By Hollis Architzel 

Last year I lived in Israel for 9 months as a part of Workshop 50.  I was in Israel for the first several months of the second Intifada.  Being there during this time strengthened my resolve to work for a lasting peace based on justice.  During a seminar in Jerusalem Jeremy Milgrom, the field director for an organization called Rabbi’s for Human Rights, came to speak and show a documentary.  The documentary detailed the struggle of a group of Bedouins, the Jahalin, displaced from their homes by the completion of the settlement Maaleh Adumim.  This was the second time these people were displaced.  Most of the older people in the village remember being displaced from their original villages in 1948.  As I sat in the little room at Kiryat Moriah, I cried for the Jahalin.  And I cried for Israel.  That documentary made a lasting impression on me; in Habonim Dror, I was always taught the importance of social justice.  In that spirit I wanted to do something about the situation.  I got my chance when I lived in a chava (a commune of sorts) with my Israeli peers in our sister youth movement, Hanoar HaOved in Jerusalem.  For three and a half weeks I volunteered at the Rabbis for Human Rights (RHR) office. Before October RHR had been sending groups of Internationals to teach English to the Jahalin children.  Because of the Intifada RHR stopped sending groups.  A group of committed activists continued to work with the Jahalin.  And although RHR could not officially sanction it, they gave me and Elana Margolis, another woman in my kvutsa, phone numbers to get in touch with those people.  At first I was a bit dubious about teaching Palestinian children English.  I felt like I was being the benevolent American giving the gift of English.  After asking around I learned that the parents wanted their children to learn English because in being removed from their homes, the Jahalin could no longer raise livestock and were forced to enter into a lifestyle that required English to succeed in the business world.  So Elana and I decided to help tutor the Bedouin children in English.  The first time I went out I was really nervous.  We went to Damascus Gate and met up with the other Internationals who would be going with us.  We got in a Palestinian sherut, the big taxi things.  I remember being told on MBI to make sure I never accidentally got in a taxi with green license plates, and here I was on workshop doing it on purpose.  The first time I crossed the green line I had goose bumps.  Elana and I were breaking HDNA policy by going into Palestine.  The sherut dropped us off several hundred meters from the Jahalin’s encampment because the road isn’t paved.  We walked up and were greeted by 10 smiling children.  We divided them up by age.  I worked with 3 older girls who already spoke English quite well.  We took turns reading aloud from an old book.  I divided my time in between working with these kids and volunteering in the Rabbis for Human Rights office doing mostly envelope stuffing and mailing lists.  Throughout the time I was working with RHR the IDF had been putting up roadblocks around Palestinian villages.  RHR and other human rights activists participated in a series of non-violent direct actions to remove the roadblocks to allow ambulances and food trucks in and out.  During one such action I was in charge of being the media contact in the RHR office.  I called several media outlets in Israel giving them updates on the action.  I reported the progress in removing the roadblocks and reported on arrests taking place.  Another campaign RHR was involved in was replanting Palestinian olive trees that had been uprooted by the IDF.  RHR also sold olive oil for Palestinians unable to leave their villages due to roadblocks.  I helped sell the olive oil out of their Jerusalem office.  Rabbis for Human Rights also does extensive work with foreign workers in Israel and with budget cuts affecting the Israeli poor.  I also went on a trip organized by RHR to several Bedouin villages in the Negev.  The Israeli government does not recognize most Bedouin Villages.  This is a huge problem because they are not connected to the main electricity and water grids.  I visited a Bedouin school.  The children sat 2 and 3 to a desk.  Another problem with villages being unrecognized is the Bedouin are not allowed to build permanent homes, school, medical clinics, etc.  One such village had built illegally.  I couldn’t understand how building a school for your children on land you have lived on for 50 years could be illegal, especially when illegal Jewish settlements in the West Bank frequently get retroactive recognition.  Since leaving Israel, I have continued to get updates from RHR about their activities.  Rabbis For Human Rights has remained committed to uphold all human rights, of Palestinians, of Israelis even during such trying times.  I am proud to have worked to ensure that even during a period where human rights are often last on anyone’s agenda I had the opportunity to work for a more just world.  So what did I learn working with RHR?  I learned Israel is not utopia I thought it was.  I learned that Israel has displaced thousands of Palestinians in the building of settlements.  I learned that we have so much work to do if Israel is ever going to be a “light among nations.”  I learned that while settlements have sparkling pools a group of children living outside Jerusalem couldn’t count on clean drinking water everyday.  I learned that true peace means more than not fighting.  And I learned that the best falafel in the world isn’t in Afula.  It’s in Palestine.

What Habonim Did to Me!

By Chaver Tnua, Ezra Weinberg

When people ask me what I want to be when I grow up this is what I say: I want to live my life as a Jewish leader and activist. I want my Judaism to inspire me to change the world and I want my words, but more my actions, to have impact on others.  These goals are a direct result of the profound experience of 15 summers in Habonim Dror.     

Habonim along with my Reconstructionist Jewish background helped me to understand the evolution of the Jewish people as an ongoing struggle, using a unique blend of spirit and action to transform suffering in the world.  Throughout our history Jews have been pioneers in this struggle to end suffering and build peaceful communities embodying our highest moral values. The message has never been more urgent with the current waves of violence in Israel.  The Judaism that I connect to inspires me to commit my life to working for peace to someday prevail over war and injustice.   Moving to Israel to get involved in the peace building movement between Israelis and Palestinians is a reflection of this connection.  If there were ever a need for pioneers in peace-building, especially in Israel, the time is now.

                                         *      *         *          *          *          *          *

I am proud to say that Jerusalem is my home right now and HDNA had a lot to do with getting me here.  I love it here.  I love hearing Rikud Am music on the radio and having a rule of only one falafel per week.  I also love speaking Hebrew and learning Arabic.  But I love nothing more than Shabbat in Jerusalem, when I can say Shabbat Shalom to random strangers and also be expected to invite myself over for Shabbat dinner with people I meet in Shul.  And yet, the massive among of societal ills going on here, most notably the Occupation, breaks my heart.  That said, there's not a day that goes by where I'm not doing something to help turn this place into a country I can be fully proud of. 

 For those who don't know, I'm working in East Jerusalem for the "Palestine-Israel Journal," where I'm constantly in dialogue with my Palestinian co-workers who are subject to roadblocks, curfews and all the daily threats of the occupation, because they come in from work over the green line everyday. For example, recently one of my  Palestinian co-workers - a divorced mother of 4 – experienced the fright of having her 11 year old son trapped in Ramallah while under siege by the Israeli Army.  She hadn't slept in 48 hours because she was too nervous about her son - holding her phone most of the time hoping to hear from them.  These were not media reports from a biased source that I was hearing.  These were direct interactions between me and the people I work with.  I tried to comfort them as best as I could.  But honestly, I was too scared to try and imagine what it would be like to be in their shoes.  I told them I was praying for them, but inside I knew I was also praying that their pain would not translate into hatred towards Israel and Jewish people.

 The same day I managed to phone my co-worker in Ramallah just as she was at the outer checkpoint trying to get out.  As a Journalist she had some international connections - which I was lucky enough to retrieve for her when we spoke.  By the evening she managed to get out with a BBC truck.  She was extremely grateful the last time I spoke to her.  She told me that my phone call really made a big difference in getting her out of Ramallah.  The power of a little human contact can go a long way. 

Working with Palestinians I hear things I don’t always agree with.  Recently I heard my boss, who is the PA  Minister of Jerusalem Affairs, compare Jenin to the Warsaw uprising.  And he's considered a Palestinian moderate.  My work involves dialoging with that point of view, which is hardly considered extreme. 

And when I'm not at the Journal, very often I'm working with Arab Bedouin children, learning Arabic  ("Ahhtilal Yiktulna" = the Occupation is killing all of us), or attending demos and rallies supporting the peace movement.

Much of the will that propels me to my activism and keeps me coming to work in East Jerusalem everyday, despite everyone telling me I'm crazy, is this strong sense of Justice that was instilled upon me in my years of being in HDNA.  HDNA was a movement about action. 

Most of my later years in HDNA, when my real political consciousness started to develop, I wasn't able to call myself a Zionist.   The non-Zionist faction of HDNA challenged me to constantly re-evaluate my Zionism.  I used to reconcile it by saying that I was a "Zionist in Question."  Well no more.  Since moving here I have rediscovered that I am a Zionist.  Proud and true.  And I say that not out of pride or patriotism for what Israel is today, but because I believe in the Israel that could be.  I should also say that I didn't make Aliya because I felt like working as a peace-builder and having army service would have been too difficult to reconcile.  I also don't purport to say that I will be here for the rest of my life.  But my Zionism is the force that takes pride in the commitment I've made to devoting a serious chunk of my life to building Israel.  When I say build you know I'm not talking about the borders and swamps, but rebuilding the social and moral fabric of this society, which we all know needs a hell of a lot of work. 

HDNA taught me that to be Zionist, pro-Palestinian, pro peace, and pro justice is not a contradiction.  I'm sure some of you can argue that it is.  I've spent a lot of hours listening to those arguments. However, I believe that a fair, just and lasting agreement can be reached to end this conflict, but it's going to take a lot of hard work to get there.  I give credit to HDNA for teaching me that it's my responsibility to deal with Israel and not wash my hands of it, just because it's not the country that I want it to be right now.  So we've created a monster over here.  No disputing that.  It's thrashing all over the Middle East hurting many people and itself in the process.  

 

The bottom line for me is that I want to devote a fairly decent portion of my life to fixing it.  And HDNA taught me that message.